Archive for the 'Relax… its Ghana' Category

Salius says: You have Malaria!?

I guess You have three main questions in Your mind now…

 

First, “who is Salius” – a Lithuanian guy who is in Ghana for the last 3 years

Second, “what is the title about” – its playing with “Simon says” game

Third, “wtf??? You have malaria??? Are you still alive? Flying home right?” – malaria that the f*** / Yes / Yes / No

 

Ok, so what is malaria…?

me: some sickness which makes You feel like You are in the worst hangover, except that You dont puke but shit a river (at least there is something left in the stomach and after). You get it from those damn mosquitos that fly here everywhere and that I am systematically killing (with pleasure and a feeling satisfied hunter) every day/evening. You need to take pills or You will feel shitty even longer. There is no vaccination, You can only eat pills so You dont take malaria, because than You would have to take pills (exactly… You take pills for weeks to avoid pills for some few bad days).

wikipedia: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Malaria

 

How did I get it?

I caught a mosquito and sucked his inside…  :P  It bit me, what else?

 

How am I feeling?

Now I am good, but as soon as I get late with the pills by some hours I still get a headache.

 

So how to know You have malaria?

Go to doctor. But basically: You feel dried up, mouth feels like You liked dried shit in terms of it beeing full dry and bad taste. This even a minute after drinking. You dont feel like eating and all food tastes bad. You have a high temperature that sometimes switches to cold skin. You have headache, pains behing eyes, in shoulders and hips. You feel dizzy and are not too good in keeping balance. Your mind and body is slow, sometimes You feel like a puppet on strings. You feel like sleeping all the time, but cant stay sleeping – wake up every few minutes and feel like You slept a lot but still feel tired. In my case I had slightly halucinative dreams involving a huge number of pillows in my bed and me mindcontrolling electric wiring in the house by “growing” into the network.

 

What is the Salius guy about?

I was at a friends house, still thinking I just got food poisoned, I lay down and take a nap. When I wake up Salius is in and he shakes my hand…. And while doing so says: “You have malaria, right!?”. Thats when I realized I have fever and now have all symptoms of malaria (I had 39 C). He took me to the hospital where I got some drugs and started to get better.

 

Is it fun?

Well its like getting food poisoned in Karachi… You dont get it – You are lucky… Come and try on Your own.

Want to sell something? Use your head and traffic lights!

Yep so the traffic in Accra sucks…

  • In morning all roads are clugged because everybody goes to work
  • On midday all roads are clugged because everybody goes for lunch
  • At afternoon all roads are clugged because everybody goes home
So whereever You go, it takes at least two hours…
So why not use it and create a mobile hypermarket? 
Whenever You stop or slow donw there is somebody selling something from a basket on the top of their head or from their hands, here is a selection of goods I noticed while waiting on a crossroad:
  • walking sticks
  • covers for suit
  • DVD cleaning set
  • shirts
  • glasses
  • binoculars
  • clocks
  • ballon ball
  • window shades
  • souvenirs
  • cell phone credit cards
  • newspapers
  • chocolate
  • hankerchiefs
  • yam (like big potatoes)
  • books 
  • rat poison (with a sample dead rat to attract attention)
  • water
  • CDs and DVDs